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Signs of Cyberbullying Every Parent Should Know

7 min read

The Hidden Crisis

Unlike traditional bullying, cyberbullying follows children home. There's no escape when the harassment continues through their phone, even in their bedroom at night.

The statistics are alarming:

  • 37% of students aged 12-17 have experienced cyberbullying
  • Only 1 in 10 victims tell a parent
  • Cyberbullying victims are nearly twice as likely to self-harm

Most parents don't find out until significant damage has been done. Knowing the warning signs can help you intervene earlier.

Behavioral Warning Signs

Sudden Changes in Device Use

  • Stops using phone/computer — avoiding the source of harassment
  • Increased device use — obsessively checking for new messages
  • Hides screen when you walk by
  • Deletes social media accounts suddenly
  • Creates new accounts you don't know about

Emotional Changes

  • Appears upset, sad, or angry after going online
  • Becomes withdrawn or depressed
  • Seems anxious or fearful
  • Mood swings that coincide with device use
  • Cries without explanation

Social Changes

  • Withdraws from friends and family
  • Avoids school or social situations
  • Stops talking about friends they used to mention
  • Doesn't want to go to parties or events they used to enjoy
  • Changes friend groups suddenly

Physical Signs

  • Trouble sleeping or nightmares
  • Changes in eating habits
  • Frequent headaches or stomachaches (stress-related)
  • Appears tired and exhausted

Academic Changes

  • Declining grades
  • Loss of interest in schoolwork
  • Doesn't want to go to school
  • Asks to stay home frequently

What Cyberbullying Looks Like

Your child might not recognize what's happening as "bullying." Help them understand that cyberbullying includes:

  • Mean messages — insults, threats, or cruel comments
  • Exclusion — being deliberately left out of group chats or online groups
  • Rumor spreading — sharing lies or personal information to damage reputation
  • Impersonation — someone creating fake accounts pretending to be them
  • Sharing embarrassing content — photos, screenshots, or videos shared without permission
  • Harassment — repeated unwanted contact
  • Doxxing — sharing personal information like address or phone number publicly

How to Ask Without Interrogating

If you notice warning signs, don't demand to see their phone immediately. This can make them shut down.

Try these approaches:

Start with general questions:

  • "How are things going with your friends lately?"
  • "Is anyone at school being mean to people online?"
  • "I read about cyberbullying today. Does that happen at your school?"

If you suspect something:

  • "I've noticed you seem down after being on your phone. Is everything okay?"
  • "You can tell me anything, even if you think I might be upset. I'm on your team."
  • "If something happened online, I'd want to help, not punish you."

What to Do If Your Child Is Being Cyberbullied

1. Stay Calm

Your reaction matters. If you freak out, they'll regret telling you. Take a breath.

"Thank you for telling me. This isn't your fault, and we'll figure it out together."

2. Document Everything

Before blocking or deleting:

  • Screenshot all messages, posts, and comments
  • Note dates, times, and usernames
  • Save any evidence of harassment

3. Don't Respond to Bullies

Tell your child not to reply or retaliate. It usually makes things worse.

4. Block and Report

  • Block the bully on all platforms
  • Report the behavior to the social media platform
  • Most platforms take cyberbullying seriously and will remove content

5. Involve the School If Necessary

If the bully is a classmate:

  • Contact the school counselor or principal
  • Bring your documented evidence
  • Schools are increasingly required to address cyberbullying

6. Know When to Escalate

Involve law enforcement if:

  • There are threats of violence
  • Sexual content is being shared
  • The harassment is severe and ongoing
  • Your child is in danger

7. Consider Professional Support

A therapist can help if your child is:

  • Showing signs of depression or anxiety
  • Struggling to cope
  • Expressing thoughts of self-harm

Preventing Cyberbullying Before It Happens

Build Open Communication

Create an environment where your child feels safe telling you things. Regular check-ins about their online life make it easier to share problems.

Teach Digital Citizenship

  • Treat others online as you would in person
  • Think before posting
  • Stand up for others being bullied
  • Know how to block and report

Set Up Monitoring

Parental control apps can alert you to:

  • Concerning search terms
  • Dramatic changes in messaging patterns
  • Access to apps known for cyberbullying
  • Signs of distress in their online activity

Know Their Online World

  • Which apps do they use?
  • Who are their online friends?
  • What games do they play?
  • Are their accounts public or private?

If Your Child Is the Bully

Sometimes the hard truth is that our child is the one doing the bullying. Signs include:

  • Laughing at their phone with a mean undertone
  • Having multiple accounts or "fake" accounts
  • Getting in trouble at school for behavior
  • Showing a lack of empathy

If you discover this:

  • Stay calm but take it seriously
  • Have a direct conversation about impact
  • Implement consequences
  • Understand why they're doing it (insecurity? peer pressure?)
  • Consider counseling

ParentalEdge helps parents stay aware of their child's digital activity with real-time alerts and activity monitoring — giving you insights to start important conversations before problems escalate.